Thursday 29 November 2018

Every Top of the Pops Wins

The good news is that BBC4 have confirmed The Story Of/Big Hits 1987 for the new year, so what better way to celebrate than with this 16th Ocober 1986 edition of Top of the Pops!

Kiss you nights

16/10/86  (Simon Bates & Steve Wright)

Pet Shop Boys – “Suburbia” (8)
Looking like they've just strolled in off the street to get the show underway, but Suburbia got no higher.

Cliff Richard & Sarah Brightman – “All I Ask Of You” (7) (video)
Cliff and Sarah get a little bit saucy and this tune from The Phantom of the Opera peaked at number 3.

Boris Gardiner – “You’re Everything To Me” (25)
Boris finally makes it into the studio to perform what became his final top 40 hit when it peaked at number 11.

Marti Webb – “Always There” (14)
Went up one more place.

The Housemartins – “Think For A Minute” (28) (breaker)
Peaked at number 18.

The Police – “Don’t Stand So Close To Me ‘86” (24) (breaker)
Got no higher.

Midnight Star – “Midas Touch” (22) (breaker)
Became their only top ten hit when it peaked at number 8.

Paul Hardcastle – “The Wizard” (23)
Paul seems to be having a blast performing the new Top of the Pops theme tune in the studio with his army of keyboards, and it peaked at number 15.

Nick Berry – “Every Loser Wins” (1) (video)
First of three weeks at number one.

Status Quo – “In The Army Now” (5) (video/credits)
On its way to number 2.


23rd October is next.

25 comments:

  1. On paper Master Bates and Wrighty should have made for another Gruesome Twosome, but in fact they seemed to have a reasonable chemistry and even Wrighty was more engaged in proceedings than he sometimes is. Like Gazza, however, he was evidently under the impression that Boris Gardiner had never had a hit before his recent number 1…

    This show was tailor-made for Bates, with its ballad-heavy line-up. Something a bit livelier to start with, however, as PSB perform their latest hit for the second time. What does a cowboy hat have to do with suburbia, Neil? Wouldn’t a bowler have been better? If Ken Russell really did direct that Cliff/Sarah Brightman video, then it’s fair to say he must have been having an off day, as his trademark flamboyance is replaced by unconvincing CSO backdrops that wouldn’t have looked out of place in early 70s Doctor Who. It was also rather icky to see Cliff pretending to be a red-blooded heterosexual unable to keep his paws off Sarah, who looks eminently resistible to me - in fairness, I think she actually looks better now than she did back then. As for the song, it is a nice understated ballad which makes for quite a soothing listen. Phantom had only just opened in the West End at this point, and the best song from the show is still to come on TOTP.

    I didn’t realise that Boris managed to chart with the follow-up to his big hit. Nice to see him finally turn up in the studio, but the performance isn’t exactly memorable and neither is this tune, which is slightly overwhelmed in places by intrusive synth washes. The slow pace continues as Marti Webb shows up to warble the Howards’ Way theme. At least she can sing, unlike Anita Dobson and Nick Berry, and this is certainly the best of Simon May’s TV show cash-ins. Again though it is hardly the most exciting performance, with a darkly-clad Marti all alone on the darkened main stage.

    Not a great clutch of breakers this week, and thankfully we won’t be subjected to any more of that very dodgy and unnecessary remake of Don’t Stand So Close to Me. I don’t like the original much, but this version is far worse. A bouncy Paul Hardcastle next, outdoing Howard Jones with his two triple-decker sets of synths, and trying as hard as he can to sell the record while probably realising that a man playing the keyboards is not inherently televisual. As with Jan Hammer and Harold Faltermeyer, TOTP tries to get round the problem by splicing some clips of the video. The remaining songs have been on before, but we get to see Quo (with their first airing on BBC4 in these 1986 repeats) looking all monochrome and serious in their video, a fitting end to a show badly lacking in visual sparkle.

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    1. The video clips during the Paul Hardcastle studio performance had some similar concepts to the video of Welcome to The Pleasuredome by Frankie Goes To Hollywood a year earlier, by means of the bald-headed master saying 'HaHaHaHaHa" in that deep voice, and also a journey into the unknown.

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  2. Good news that 1987 is confirmed, which inevitably makes my thoughts turn to the next blog title. Pump Up the Volume does seem to be the obvious choice, even though it won't feature on BBC4 at all!

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    1. Shame it doesn't feature, otherwise like you say it would be a good title.

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    2. I for one will be happy never to hear 'Pump up the volume' ever again!!!

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    3. Love Pump Up the Volume ("Love Pump"?!) and am very pleased the repeats soldier on next year.

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    4. hmmm - should i soldier on with 1987 myself, or not? there were still some great singles released that year to my recollection, although the charts were fast-being over-run by (c)rap and sample-dominated stuff - not to mention the dreaded SAW factory now more than looming on the horizon! looks like i'll cross that bridge (or not) when i come to it...

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    5. '87 is the final year that I am really looking forward to in these reruns, as I think there was still quite a bit of good stuff around even as rap, house and production line-era SAW began to dominate the charts. It's 1988 where things really started to go downhill, for me, though I am going to carry on until the end of the decade for the sake of completeness.

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    6. Incidentally, I've thought another potential title for '87 - Heart and Soul.

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    7. perhaps a good title for the 1987 blog would be "it's over"?

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    8. It's the pre-Britpop early 90s I'm not looking forward to, I struggled to find anything worth listening to and resorted to Tom Waits albums. Needless to say, he never made it to TOTP.

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    9. You had Since Yesterday as the 1985 blog title despite no BBC Four airing for the song.

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  3. PSB kick things off deceptively, for this isn't a dance about show, this is a put your slippers on, sip your cocoa and fall asleep in front of Countdown show. That woman in red down the front is borderline hysterical. When does Chris's BOY cap make its first appearance, then?

    After that we settle into a soporific groove, with Cliff and Saz emoting over old footage of Holiday '78. Not Ken's finest three minutes, he really phoned this in compared with his usual visual flamboyance. As for the song, the usual Webber operetta stodge.

    Boris! You made it at last! Where were you three weeks ago? He needn't have bothered with this follow-up, it was even more anonymous than his last reggae lite effort, though this episode's overexcitable audience seem to scream at everything.

    Marti Webb, now the main problem with this is the best bit of the Howard's Way theme tune was the upbeat, dynamic part where it speeded up, just as the end credits started. Which is nowhere to be heard on this dreary effort. Would have loved to hear Marti tackle that. She likes someone in the audience, I note, keeps smiling at them.

    Breakers, the nadir being the Police's rerecording, one of the worst things they ever did, you can almost hear the resentment in having to reunite to do it. The Housemartins' ditty is one of their reflective numbers, a rather great moody piece that is curiously undermined by the jokey video we see the very end of here. Then Midnight Star - or is it Atlantic Starr? Anyway, they threaten to rouse us from our slumber by moving at a fair clip.

    Not a bad intro to Paul Hardcastle, who any other week would have been ho-hum, but here actually gives the audience something to dance to and it all feels a bit brighter by contrast, even if he has seriously overestimated his keyboard contingent. Nowadays he would just press a button on his phone.

    Watching this live, I had to sit through Nick Berry's "one for the mums" effort, oh well, at least it's naff enough to make me laugh. That old bloke in the sunglasses looks more like every loser loses.

    Status Quo to plod to the end of the show, interspersed with what looks like footage from one of those military docusoaps like The Paras that the nation was obsessed with for a while in the 80s. Well, the dads and sons were. Actually: The Paras theme tune and the Thomas the Tank Engine theme tune - separated at birth?

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    1. The Beeb seem to have thought the same as you about Marti's version, as they used it over the end credits for just one series before substituting it for the upbeat instrumental version.

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  4. Our hosts look really smart in their ties tonight…

    Pet Shop Boys – Suburbia – Love the headgear and the old green computer terminal that featured on later appearances I recall. Can’t work out what is on the display though! Great song btw. Never have run with the dogs myself however.

    Cliff Richard and Sarah Brightman – All I ask of you – Nine months after the title track from ‘Phantom of the Opera’ was released as a single comes this sumptuous ballad. Surely one of the most romantic and beautiful songs ever featured in a show (which I’ve seen five times). The video must have been enjoyable to shoot!

    Boris Gardiner – You’re everything to me – Surprise! No more walking around Metropolitan line tube stations for Boris he’s reggaed into the studio for this one. I don’t remember this at all. Not a jot, and frankly not worth waking up for.

    Marti Webb – Always there – It’s a nice song for a theme from ‘Howard’s Way’ (hugely popular Sunday night viewing at the time) but it feels like it needs a bit of production oomph to spice it up. I’d have added drums and bass from the third verse; a bit like (say) ‘Desperado’ by the Eagles. Marti has a long hair sticking out to the right of her head (left as you look) and seems to say something to someone in the audience halfway through. The last we’ll see of Marti on ToTP….and one of life’s great musical mysteries is why her single ‘Your ears should be burning now’ was not massive.

    Breakers – Housemartins – don’t recall this. Doesn’t seem great. The Police – This isn’t great…if it ain’t broken…. Midnight Star – more pap.

    Paul Hardcastle – The Wizard – Looks like he’s enjoying himself.

    Nick Berry – Every Loser wins – OK, one of my vague claims to fame. This song was co-written by brothers Stewart and Bradley James (real surnames Palmer). They were known as the James Boys and in May 1973 released a catchy single called ‘Over and Over’ (written by Peter Lee Stirling aka Daniel Boone (who funnily enough flew radio controlled model aeroplanes in my Dad’s Model Flying Club)). I recall this single getting a lot of airplay and it reached no39 on a six week chart run in the (then) top50. I started Secondary School in September 1973 and who should be in my year but Stewart Palmer, whilst the elder Bradley was a year above me. They fitted in like ordinary school boys with no glitzy entourage in evidence. By the middle of the second year, they both abruptly left the school. So this song by Nick Berry, as well as being a great song, despite Nick not being the best of singers, features a sparkling arrangement (wonderful piano) and also conjures up this:-

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yCHcO8UH0Iw

    Status Quo – In the Army now – A very sombre looking Quo in this video with some stock footage of squaddies, and no Noddy.

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    1. i remember reading about the james boys a while back via our friend nigel's "golden years" blog, and even listening to one or two of their tracks as a result (standard teeny pop of the era to my recollection) - they were actually white and british, but were so dark and dusky they were assumed to asians in some quarters!

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    2. Agreed about the Cliff/Sarah video, although I'm trying to think why Simon Bates referred to it twice during the show as 'an over-the-top video', ie, at the start of the show, and then when introducing the single? Nice that we got a whole four minutes of the video, as it certainly tickled the spine a bit with its love and affection theme.

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  5. Signs you're getting old: Will Smith has just made his debut in the TOTP repeats chart from 1986...

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  6. hosts: oh dear, this one looks like a candidate for worst show of the series so far - perhaps it's no coincidence that slimy is one of the hosts, given at least half of what was on display was "our tune" central

    cliff/sarah brightman: did anyone still actually believe that cliff had an eye for the ladies at this point? as for sarah, what attracted her to the millionaire andrew lloyd webber?

    boris gardiner: apologies to boris as i had him pegged as disappearing from the charts after his no.1 hit. whilst still a touch on the sugary side, it's certainly preferable to that. however i never got to hear this one ad nauseum

    marti webb: oh no, it's another dose of simon may - the poor mans andrew lloyd webber. if there is indeed such a thing

    housemartins: not sure if this got any more exposure on the show thanks to its relatively low chart position, but it's far and away the best thing they ever did with some excellent harmony work. beware though - i got hold of a copy of their debut album to transfer it over to digital, and discovered it was a completely different recording in the thrashing style of their debut hit

    police: just exactly was the point of this? had they overcame their differences to come up with an original tune then it might have been worth it as i like andy summers' guitar work, but it's wasted on this re-hash

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  7. To say that this is hardly one of the best shows of 86 is a massive understatement.

    PSB - Probably the best thing on the show, even though it's my least favourite single from 'Please'. Really not sure about Neil's look though...

    Cliff / Sarah - Bleurgh! Not sure why the video was being sold to us as if it was some Michael Jackson like spectacle when it appears to consist solely of the pair dodgily CSO'd on top of someone's holiday footage.

    Boris Gardiner - No. NEXT!

    Marti Webb - Ah, well, maybe I was too hasty there. More rubbish, not a patch on the actual theme tune which contains both the slow AND fast bits.

    Breakers - Clock me up another mystified as to the point of that reworking by The Police.

    Paul Hardcastle - Decent song but he comes over as very smug here and it all looks somewhat silly.

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    1. (Take two, after some awful typos...)

      Top Of The Slops this time, with an unusually decent if MOR blend of hosts, dressed for an accountants’ Christmas party, masking the worst edition of the re-runs thus far.

      Yeehah! Ride’ em! Was Neil making reference to the rise of cowboy builders in suburbia? And how come Chris’s monitor gets a thumbs up this time when Howard Jones’s similar model in the last edition got a raspberry?

      A low budget level of CSO used for the ghastly “Millennium Prayer” also employed for the operatic effort. I could feel the vom rising with that clasp but managed to FF most of it. Best thing about it was Nodding Dog’s outro quips.

      Let’s rock! Get down with Boris! Not even good enough for Magicheartsmoothbilge FM these days.

      What was it with the facial tics and fidgeting by Nodding Dog after Boris?

      I watched more of Marti Webb than I meant to as I was drawn in by her, erm, horny housewife outfit. Sorry about that.

      A brilliant tune by the Housemartins, and all we get is a snippet of the last chorus, for this week at least. The whole video shows drummer Firestarter Hugh bored behind his kit early doors and constantly trying to take over as star of the shoot.

      Fully agree, that Police rehash was shite of the highest order.

      Lots of glam for Midnight Star for a drab tune in a disused warehouse. Thankfully, the video clip was miniscule.

      Nodding Dog, the only thing special about “The Wizard” was it won the Arthur Nibble award for quickest FF of the re-runs thus far.

      I have to admit, I do like that four note (two notes repeated) piano refrain in “Every Loser Wins”. That’s the only bit, though.

      A black, white, green and beige video for Status Quo’s black, white and beige tune.

      That goodness that’s over!

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    2. I think it was around this time that Marti Webb married her second husband Tim Flavin (wearer of huge glasses I recall) after, allegedly a two week courtship. It didn't last.

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  9. So Slimes and Wrighty up next. Not exactly a winning combination. Let's hope the music is good.


    PSB. Fabulous as always. Nice mac Neil.

    Cliff/Sarah show off some dodgy CSO to plug their single. Really not sure what to make of this. Not my style of music at all but this would probably be quite good with a proper opera singer rather than Cliff. I'll pass thanks. And you can keep the snogging too..yuck.

    Boris has bothered to show up I see. Bit late as this is nowhere as good as Wake Up. Bit karaoke in the production but he can hold a tune. An improvement on Cliff is probably the best compliment I can play it.

    Marti Webb. As I said last time, finally a decent version of a TV theme tune. From possibly the cheesiest, campest and BEST slice of 80s TV this side of Dallas. I like this,

    Breakers:
    Housemartins. Don't remember this one, suitably naff video and the song is equally naff as well.
    The Police. Did we need this version? It has lost all its tune,,oh dear.
    Midnight Star. More outdated soul. No thank you.

    Paul Hardcastle. Another plug for the theme tune. Should have shown the video. The 90s dance songs make crap studio performances problem begins. At least Paul tries to give itm some. love the tune though and the video is very good.

    Nick Berry. Did Steve Wright just intoduce him as live and then cut to the video! Surely Eastenders could have spared him for the evening. This video really is crap. I don't mind the song though.

    Status Quo video. I remember this very well. Love the song as well.

    Bit hit and miss tonight, music either good or crap. Presenters just bland.







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    1. The Cliff and Sarah snog looked quite fruity. I guess they had fun rehearsing it too!

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