They never play the songs we nose
09/03/89 (Nicky Campbell, Lenny Henry and Hale & Pace)
The Reynolds Girls – “I'd Rather Jack” (17)
Getting this Red Nose Day special underway their only hit and it peaked at number 8.
Dusty Springfield – “Nothing Has Been Proved” (16)
In the studio performing the theme song from the Christine Keeler movie 'Scandal' this Pet Shop Boys composition was at its peak.
Womack & Womack – “Celebrate The World” (24)
Singing live in the studio this final top 40 hit for the duo peaked at number 19.
Deacon Blue – “Wages Day” (18)
Perhaps not their best ever tune but this was an absolute storming live performance but the song went up no higher.
Paula Abdul – “Straight Up” (15)
Making her studio debut with her first of three top ten hits and it peaked at number 3.
Bananarama & Lananeeneenoonoo – “Help” (3) (video)
This year's Comic Relief single was now at its peak.
Donna Summer – “This Time I Know It’s For Real” (11)
Performing in the studio and the song peaked at number 3.
Jason Donovan – “Too Many Broken Hearts” (1) (video)
First of two weeks at number one.
WASP – “Mean Man” (21) (video/credits)
At its peak.
And for a little bit of extra-time fun tonight, can you work out what songs Pan's People are dancing to here without the sound?
16th March is next.
This show is a reminder of a time when Red Nose Day was a genuinely big, novel and exciting event, rather than the tired luvviefest it has become. I have fond memories of this second one in particular, not least Lenny Henry invading a serious late night discussion show that Clive James was hosting on BBC2 at the same time, but sadly he is a massive irritant here, doing his normal lazy thing of assuming that putting on a few loud silly voices is funny. So shouty is he that he makes Anthea Turner sound shy and retiring by comparison, and it also has the effect of making Nicky Campbell seem less annoying than he normally is. Future chart-toppers Hale and Pace (whatever happened to them?) are there too in their “Management” guise, but likewise fail to say anything funny.
ReplyDeleteTo the music, and we start in unpromising fashion with the Reynolds Girls and a song widely regarded as the nadir of SAW. It isn’t quite as bad as that, and you could just about imagine Mel & Kim doing a credible job with it, but the Reynolds lack the Applebys’ star power, for all their energetic efforts, and this ultimately just feels naff. For the record, I would definitely rather Fleetwood Mac than jack. Something much more classy from Dusty next, back in the TOTP studio for the first time since the late 70s and looking almost overcome with emotion at the start. She quickly pulls it together to deliver a fine performance, and what a great, seductive and vaguely menacing PSB composition this is, though it is debatable whether Please Please Me ever did get to number 1 – it depends what chart you look at. It is a timely coincidence that this should turn up just after the new dramatisation of the Profumo affair has come to an end on BBC1.
Womack and Womack return with a live performance and Linda undertaking the unusual combination of singing duties with stand-up drumming. The sentiments of the song are admirable, but it feels like a slightly incoherent mess, and the live singing enhances that feeling. Nicky is all excited that his fellow Scots Deacon Blue are in the studio, but this dull-as-ditchwater effort fails to justify his enthusiasm. They can rock out and swing their terrible hair around as much as they like, but it can’t make up for the deficiencies of the song…
Thankfully things improve with Paula Abdul, who marries a good song to some impressive choreography (presumably devised by herself) that works well in the confines of that small studio stage. Even better is Donna Summer, with perhaps the finest of SAW’s later records. It’s as if they knew that they needed to raise their game if they were going to work with a legend, and this is a really joyful and infectious pop record. Donna looks immaculate in black for this performance, and like Dusty seems pleased to be back on TOTP. Sadly the quality takes a nosedive for the playout, with more forgettable hair metal from WASP and a video that does exactly what you would expect. By now the rock world was desperately crying out for Nirvana to come along and shake things up a bit, but it would have to wait a while longer yet.
Scandal (the Profumo film) is coming out on Blu-ray soon if you want to compare. But shouldn't the theme song be called Nothing Has Been Proven?
DeleteHere's an online disquisition on "proved" and "proven", but I'm not sure it fully resolves this particular controversy:
Deletehttps://writingexplained.org/proved-vs-proven
Interestingly Hale & Pace's first and only TOTP as guest presenters and they would perform on the stage to perform 'The Stonk' in 1991 which will be coming up to mid February next year, as with the other two new presenters Jenny Powell and Jakki Brambles are still to come in the 1989 repeat run, as with Jason Donovan didn't appear to perform 'Too Many Broken Hearts' on the Comic Relief-themed episode, as having heard the Sunday evening announcement from Bruno Brookes on the day that he was at number one and whereas Simple Minds were knocked down to number two.
ReplyDeleteSo far we've had over five weeks of consecutive uninterrupted TOTP episodes from 1989 and as it will keep going, so far no "muted issues" so far, only Drama has skipped one episode of Casualty series 12 and one episode of EastEnders from 28th July 1992, that was probably down to the producer, there wasn't no "muted issues" on master tapes.
I always found Comic Relief a rather oppressive occasion, "You must have fun!" type thing, but I do like Lenny Henry and he makes me laugh here ("His name rhymes with basin!"). His autobiography is a genuinely interesting read, full of anecdotes about 70s showbiz from someone who was there.
ReplyDeleteTo the tunes, and here's a couple of sisters who took on the titans of rock, either that or they were the puppets of SAW who wanted total dominance of the airwaves - they certainly came close on this episode. I suppose their girls next door image was the point, but they did look as if they were dancing in front of their bedroom mirror. And no, one of them isn't dead, they're both still alive (and presumably not living off the royalties of their chart career).
A sharp contrast enough to give you whiplash, Dusty's back for the theme tune to the Profumo movie that we were told was a big deal, but then when it came out few were that bothered. The lyrics dutifully run through the main points, like a news bulletin. I remember Nicky Campbell saying on the radio that Neil Tennant's spoken part "It's a scandal! Such a scandal!" made him sound like a hairdresser exchanging gossip with a customer. For such a sensational story, you'd expect a song with more oomph would be appropriate. Still, Joanne Whalley, eh lads?
Womack and Womack do a live rendition of a blandly inspirational effort, Linda oddly tapping out a few beats on a couple of snares to very little effect. This sounds like a charity record too, so fits the episode.
Deacon Blue going way over the top to mediocre effect, always bemusing to see performers put their heart and soul into something that's average at best. But you have to believe in your material, right?
Paula Abdul invents The Pussycat Dolls with a show of her choreography, and fortunately this is a decent ditty that justifies the presentation. This isn't the one with the cartoon cat, right? Though it may as well be. Mind you, Hale and Pace would have put him in the microwave.
Then, straight to the top, the official Comic Relief single! What's that? They only made number 3? Ah, ahem, as you were. Maybe if Lenny had sung it as Theophilus P. Wildebeest it might have gone all the way.
Donna Summer comes back with the best thing SAW ever did, a musical high with yearning lyrics and melody married to a catchy beat that suggests defiance and optimism despite past disappointments. It's kind of inspirational too, except it really succeeds.
Jason out at his country retreat for his well-deserved number one. I expect he's saying to himself in the video, "Is she driving my tractor?!" If I did karaoke (I don't) I'd probably make quick work of this one.
Then WASP, all spandexed up, and the remarkable thing was they went out on the street like that. More or less the same as anything else they did, I note Vixen made it to the Top 40 about this point, about the only female poodle rockers. At least the fashion made more sense on them. But it was all Motley Crue ripoffs when it came down to it.
I suppose the Heart sisters looked like poodle rockers at this time, even if musically they were in a different place.
DeleteFrom memory, I think the cartoon cat was in the video for Paula Abdul's "Opposites Attract".
DeleteYes, that's correct, I just wanted to make my Hale and Pace joke. I'm so funny! Ha, ha, ha! Ahem.
Deletei remember going to the cinema to watch a pseudo film noir flick called "shattered" with joanne whalley in (or rather joanne whalley-kilmer, as she was billed back then), that was heavily hyped at the time but (like its star tom berenger) seems to have disappeared without trace now. definitely one for the "lads", as it also featured toff totty greta scacchi
DeleteYes, Joanne was married to one of Hollywood's nastiest stars, Val Kilmer, for a while, which had legions of men cursing his good luck and feeling sad at the way he treated her.
Deleteperhaps kilmer's nastiness was the reason he found out joanne was divorcing him via a tv news channel whilst he was away working on a film (with fellow "difficult" actor marlon brando) in australia?
DeleteWhen I was backpacking in Oz in 1999 I did "Too Many Broken Hearts" as a karaoke night and cleared the dance floor... I might have been slightly worse for wear at the time..
DeleteI consider that a warning from history, Morgie. Although I do have perfect pitch, so does Nigel Kennedy and nobody wants to hear him singing.
DeleteI managed 6 out of 7 on that Pan's People quiz, Angelo, though the fact it was multiple choice answers did make it a lot easier!
ReplyDeleteNot my favourite comedian by any stretch is Lenny Henry and here he’s just unfunny and irritating. Much prefer him in a straight role and what a fine turn he pulled off in a recent Dr Who episode. The whole Comic Relief thing on this show looks forced.
ReplyDeleteReynolds Girls – I’d rather jack - Hasn’t everyone got just a little sick of this ‘jack’ obsession by now? Just started off with Mr Hurley in 1988 and we’re still being treated to stuff on that theme. Now how about “My name’s Jack and I live in the back of the Great Garbo home for wayward girls and boys”.
Dusty Springfield – Nothing has been proved – Where’s Neil? Dusty is obviously singing live here but the song sounds wrong without the “It’s as scandal, such a scandal” interjections. Nice use of strings on the stage again – quite a common sight on recent shows.
Womack and Womack – Celebrate the World - A kind of lesser version of ‘Footsteps’ for me. Not a bad song but just not as good.
Deacon Blue - Wages Day – As noted above, nice performance, shame about the song. The drummer does a ‘Mick Tucker of the Sweet’ furious twiddle of a drumstick at the start and I think Roger Taylor of Queen also has this trait.
Paul Abdul – Straighten up – Wow! I enjoyed this! The routine is something that I recall Louise (Nurding/Rednapp) doing to some of her songs, and the most memorable routine in a similar style was Martine McCutcheon with ‘I’m over you’. Anyway this was much better than I expected and I am glad I refrained from my FF.
Bananarama and Whatever – Help – Lenny’s favourite eh? Was he with Dawn at this stage? An OK cover of a great song; prefer the Carpenters cover to this mind you.
Donna Summer – This time I know it’s for real – Donna rocks up in the studio for her SAW renaissance and it’s a nice performance. Can’t believe she’s been gone nearly eight years.
Jason Donovan – Too many broken hearts – Two SAW hits in a row. We get almost all the video this time which has no meeting up of Jason and his horse riding neighbour as I would have expected.
WASP – Mean Man – Sounds exactly as I would expect – all Iron Maiden and shouty vocals with screaming guitars and the obligatory ‘performance’ video. WASP’s previous chart entry was ‘Animal (F**k like a beast)’ which reached no61 in 1988. Charming.
6/7 on the Pans People quiz. Against my better judgment I got the one with the bikinis wrong!
The best 'Jack' song title up to now must surely be The Jack That House Built.
DeleteThis reminded me of previous attempts to mark 'special' occasions like the Halloween show Bates hosted earlier in the run. Shame they didn't put him in a cauldron to raise Comic Relief funds.
DeleteI'd rather Fleetwood Mac than jack but with the p*ss poor Dirty Work being their most recent album when I'd Rather Jack came out, I think the Reynolds Girls had a point about the Stones.
Neil Tennant's vocals are there, just very low and the mix. And I'm pretty sure that Dusty is miming!
DeleteAlso, Donna Summer's last appearance was only a couple of years earlier for 'Dinner With Gershwin'.
Got all seven Poppers. Bang on!
ReplyDeleteHi Anonymous! I'm on to ask if you've got the original archive versions of the following mid-80's shows that BBC4 either made cuts in or didn't show at all. They are 18/04/85 (Smithy show), 2/01/86, 5/06/86 (both links to Smithy), 26/06/86 and 17/07/86 (Smithy shows) Cheers!
ReplyDeletehere are three smithy shows
Deletehttps://we.tl/t-K1zQ28kyIo
Thanks for these, mate, great stuff! By the way, is it worth me asking for any original shows that BBC4 have already shown between 1976 and 1979, or don't you think it's worth me bothering?
Deleteyes worth asking as i have some originals from that period.
DeleteGood to hear this! I'll ask for some at a later date. Cheers!
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteOh Christ, not only do we get one of the most self-important hosts of this era, we also get one of the most self-important ‘comics’ of this era, along with a couple who rate alongside Little and Large, Cannon and Ball and midlands effort Cheese and Onion as a completely unfuny duo and a waste of time and TV space in my opinion.
ReplyDeleteI’d rather Big Mac than Jack or Fleetwood Mac myself, though I actually prefer the Filet O’Fish these days. Good choreography but eclipsed later in the show.
The return of Mary O’Brien, with a 60’s vocal vibe and 80’s backing. Nothing scandalous about this, just smooth and enjoyable.
Great, we get Comic Relief red noses in all the mugshots.
Womack x 2 with “Footsteps” x 2 and Linda claiming the Alannah Currie Award for services to percussion.
I always thought Deacon Blue’s song had a lyric about living in old Kuwait. The stage effort was inversely proportional to the value and content of the song.
Paula Abdul there with “Straight Up, Missus”. Vocals more limited than Jason Donovan, but a stage turn which could have been reworked for the Superbowl half-time slot. Obviously rehearsed beforehand.
Comic Relief song containing no comic content whatsoever. Help! Indeed.
Donna all in black for a brightly coloured SAW effort, with easier content than her first ever single “The Hostage”, in which the narrator’s husband gets hi-jacked and killed.
I quite enjoyed that Jason song and video. Obviously getting old (actually 58 on Wednesday).
Lovely, it’s We Are Sexual Perverts to finish with their tender ballad. What more could I ask for?
Happy birthday, Arthur! You made oi larf with the Alannah comment.
DeleteBy the way, Angelo, very clever use of the Reynolds Girls lyric in your caption, linking it to the Comic Relief livery. I see what you did there!
ReplyDeleteThank you Arthur - and Happy Birthday for Wednesday! Will you be singing along with Yazz?
DeleteThe only way is old! :-D
Delete:-D
Deletenothing to do with this show, but i feel obliged to mention the death of lyle mays. "who?" you may ask, as he was never actually featured on the programme (despite having a top 20 hit in collaboration with david bowie). but as a long-serving core member of the pat metheny group, in my opinion he was perhaps the most gifted piano/keyboard player ever?
ReplyDeleteFor lovers of under rehearsed comic link may I present the Comic Relief edition of TOTP. Nicky Campbell showing off, Lenny Henry being Lenny Henry and Hale & Pace trying to be funny.
ReplyDeleteThe "disappearing" Reynolds Girls - one hit and their gone.
“I'd Rather Jack” is a bouncy, fun start to the show but it's a novelty hit at best and has not aged well. No wonder the girls have hidden from the public for the last 30 years. Loving the B*Witched denim look as well.
From the ridiculous to the sublime Dusty Springfield proving what a megastar she was. “Nothing Has Been Proved” should have been Top Ten material.
I have absolutely no recollection of this Womack & Womack tune. "sung" or "shouted" LIVE. “Celebrate The World” Wish they'd sail off around it.
Loving the attempt to get the audience to sing along when they had no idea what the song was.
Highlight of the show was easily Deacon Blue with half of them singing live for some reason. I have to disagree Angelo. “Wages Day” is easily one of their finest tunes. really enjoying seeing these performances again.
Dancing Paula Abdul has come as "Ace" from Doctor Who. “Straight Up” a catchy little number and it's a great dance routine.
Another chance to see the BananaramaLananeeneenoonoo video next.
Disco Queen Dana/Donna Summer up next not really giving it her all here with “This Time I Know It’s For Real” The second SAW number of the night and they are not finished yet.
The Donovan reaches the top of the charts. Quite a fall to Number 6 for Simple Minds.
WASP! Why???
No breakers this week due to the comedy so I wonder what tracks we will miss.
Annoying comic relief interruptions..
ReplyDeleteReynolds girls - I liked it, but it just proved that anyone could have a hit with a SAW track at the time...
Love my Pet shop boys, especially with Dusty. I was reading recently that the other dusty song, what have i done to deserve this, was cowritten by the recently deceased Allee Wilson, who also wrote (amongst others) september (EWF), the Rembrandts theme for Friends and the musical ‘color of purple’. Never heard of Her before this obituary...
Womack and womack - dull
Deacon blue - sounds like deacon blue, but good performance...
Paula abdul - ok. Very dated ‘biff biff’ from the drums
Donna Summer - a pleasant ditty
Reynolds Girls - Some unfairly said that this was SAW's attempt at proving that they could have a hit with anybody. There was a follow-up, but it flopped. As for the song, in terms of content (bar slagging off specific bands admittedly) it's not that different from songs from earlier decades such as 'My Generation'.
ReplyDeleteDusty - A nice song, though 'Please Please Me' certainly wasn't No.1 in the official chart. I wonder what she's laughing at to begin with? Certainly not Hale & Pace.
Womack & Womack - Not as irritating as 'Teardrops' but still awful.
Deacon Blue - Probably one of their weakest songs, though it sounds amazing after that previous performance.
Paula Abdul - Yes, the choreography is good as you would expect, but her voice was always weak and her songs have mostly dated horribly even if this is one of the better ones.
Donna Summer - Quite possibly SAW's finest song, I absolutely love this and the album it comes from.
WASP - Lucky to get this slot. Considerably luckier than anyone having to watch and listen, certainly.